Selected Q&A from Ladies’ Jalsah with Shaykh Mus’ab Penfound

Question: How do you help motivate someone who has lost hope in Allah?

Answer: May Allah bless him or her. Our first point is always the du’a. One of our teachers taught us about the concept of spiritual bypass – the suhbah i.e. companionship… just being there for people. It is not to ask them to make du’a (for you) but for you to make du’a.

There are two things you should ask for in your du’as:

  • O Allah help this friend; give them the tools they need to navigate through this obstacle. Give them the means to only turn to You, and never to turn away from You.
  • O Allah give me the tools to help this person.

Look at people’s lives. Sometimes you don’t need (to give them) a lecture, you just need (to give them) a gift; a piece of chocolate maybe. The Prophet  told us this:

تهادوا تحابوا

Meaning: Give gifts and you will love (one another)

I know people who have become Muslim over a sambosa or a bowl curry. These are all real things. Da’wah is not just words rather, da’wah is to care for someone and if you care for someone, it does not mean that person in indebted to you. Da’wah has got nothing to do with you; the only thing that has to do with you is that Allah gifted you to become the means but it is Allah who is doing all the work. The best we can do (for da’wah) is to get our selves (nafs) out of the way. Even in service, we have to recognise that we have no self and recognise only Allah. This is the mindset of the da’iy, “Despite my short comings, You have allowed me to help your creations.” Those are the people that really help other people.

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Sometimes also, a change of environment can change a person’s state. Sometimes by asking them out to (embrace and appreciate) nature. Looking at the creations of Allah really help. Do azkar together. Da’wah is not just about quoting a hadith rather (ask yourself), “Are you representative of the hadith?” Remember that the first person you do da’wah to is to yourself. If you can’t convince your self, how are you going to convince others? Don’t just say, “QaddaraAllah” (Allah has decided it as such). This is would be “Kalimatu haqqin uridu bihal bathil which means ‘true words used in the wrong context’.”

edited from original text provided by Ustazah Nur Huraidah

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